Starting Over

May 31, 2016

Grand Canyon - May 2016

January 2016 I had a great awakening.  I attended a 5 day meditation retreat hosted by my masterful teacher Tanda where we immerse ourselves in, my personal experience, of an inner expansion that released old fears and disclosed current behaviors that make me stay in those fears.  My root chakra is where I held most of my fears and that fear was born at the moment my mother tried to burn my fingers off when I was about 4 or 5 years old.  in this retreat i was able to relive this experience – feeling the heat, the survival desire fulling my struggling in trying to get away from her as she held my hands over the stove burner.  At that moment, I learned that my life was not mine to have and that I hated my mother.  In January at 47 years old I was able to let it go and see how I was holding my life back.  Again the belief that my life was not my own – I saw how I would give my life power away to someone else.

So I started to retake my life, step by step and continue to do so today.